Monday, January 21, 2008

-31k, Goodbye


Good Bye.........I hope you all have a nice life. I need to be to work in 2 hours, and I can't manage this position, I have to sell out. About 40k in 2 days,,,,,,,,,,,,gone. Speechless. One bad trade, is all it takes. 2 and a half years of trading thrown down the drain on 1 trade. Who would've thought the Futures would tank as much as -500pts on YM with the US markets closed. I didn't, and I never really wanted to be in this position, but I couldn't accept the small loss.

Go ahead and link me and show the world how much of an idiot I am. Leave the comments of how stupid a trade I put on.

Now is probably a good time to go long now that I sold out.

68 comments:

Bubs on 7:57 AM said...

Sorry to hear about your loss man. Hopefully this will teach you a lesson that taking small losses is part of the game.

Anonymous said...

40k is not a lot of money. You are young and can earn this kind of money working so we can try again. The lesson will be far more valuable than 40k.

KC Equity Trader on 9:22 AM said...

Learn from this, keep studying on how to trade the markets, and work hard to get back in the game if you decide that is what you want to do.

Your very young and have a lot of time to make money.

My suggestions:
1. Stick with trading equities only
2. Read Technical Analysis of the futures market by John Murphy, Trading for a Living by Elder Alexander, and Reminiscences of a stock operator by Edwin LeFevre to Jesse Lauriston Livermore.

If you get back in the markets, only remember these things.

1. Trade with the Trend
2. Risk Management
3. Money Management
4. Let your profits run

Good luck and on hard days like these, always fight through them because tomorrow is always a new day.

Ragin' Cajun on 10:20 AM said...

Damn, sorry to hear this buddy.

Anonymous said...

I'm sure you'll bounce back from this. Ignore the people who choose to rub it in. Go to a quiet place and write down what you learned from this experience and stay paranoid the next time.

Trading is about survival. I'm trying my best to survive, too, so I can feel your pain. Sometimes, it feels like I'm about to break through my struggle and achieve the much-sought consistency, but sometimes I just break down. Ultimately, it seems that self-mastery, and in particular knowing your weaknesses and having a plan to avoid them, is key. All the best in the future, bro.

Bluedog on 10:48 AM said...

Man, that sucks HPT. Sorry to hear about your blowup. It's going to be grim for everyone tomorrow.

-BD

Colin on 11:09 AM said...

You have big big gambling issues, to say the least. You can carve the market, yet you continually feel the urge to play roulette, sort to speak.

You should have just gone to vegas and blown it, better memories.

Anonymous said...

Sorry to hear about your loss - I made the same mistake, though thankfully on a smaller scale.

I've read your blog and your methods, and you're obviously a smart guy. Take a step back and relax -- things will get better

Anonymous said...

Never ever day trade again. Well-informed people just DON'T DO IT. Read Malkiel or Bernstein who actually provide hard data on how pathetic the average performance of market timing/technical analysis schemes is. Your empathic day trading mates are a bunch of deluded gamblers and the only people who profit from this shit are people who suck trading provisions out of YOU - regardless of whether you are winning or losing the gambles.

Genesis on 12:25 PM said...

Bang.

Going long into a bear market? Nuts. Absolutely nuts.

Doing so with 20:1 leverage in the futures market and allowing it to get more than a handle or two away from you? Insane.

I trade futures all the time - hundreds of contracts in a month. Never, never, never have I sat on a position that has gone the wrong way like this.

You need to come over to http://www.tickerforum.org and get an education.

There is no PPT.

This has been a credit-driven bubble of epic proportions and I predicted this sort of event back last APRIL. I was early. But I've been trading the tape I'm given, and have pulled six figures out of this market in the last four weeks.

I can turn the computer off right now and go fishing for the rest of the year, and be happy.

You can recover from this but being blown out for most traders is essential, because it is what teaches you the hard way - the only way most people learn. Learning money management and risk control is THE difference between profit and loss - not being right or wrong.

There's a group of very active and smart people over at Tickerforum. We've made it THE place to come talk about this stuff, in depth and in detail, including a running daily log on the /ES futures.

Come join us......

Oli said...

I hope, you bounce back!!!
Some lessons are fucking expensive mate!

Don't give up!!! Education is key and then you will be back.

Personally I hope, that you tomorrow don't find the following situation:

Bank of China denies 8bln$ write down ...
BNP and SocGen deny their write downs ...
US traders buy as they read Barrons article about bond insurers ...
Helicopter Ben lowers rate by 1%...

S&P opens unchanged against Friday close.

Best wishes and NEVER GIVE UP!!!
Oli

rdg said...

I did almost the same at about your stage in the game. I was short the ES and had a stop in place, but pulled it as the market ran against me. It never retraced and IB eventually liquidated my position.

It hurt like hell, and it took time to save up another stake, but not once since then have I even considered not honoring my stops. It just isn't a good idea anymore.

My point is that if you can learn that lesson on a 10 lot instead of a 100 lot, it will prove to be very inexpensive and worthwhile in the future. I wish you the best.

Anonymous said...

I watched your paintbar audio strategy from YouTube. That strategy doesn't look like it's able to make any money but it can fail badly. It's too naive try to catch winners by randomly comparing 6 Bar Close.

My suggestion is that you need to study very hard on TA and figure out a real winning strategy that works at least 80% of the time becore you start trading anything.

Dinosaur Trader on 1:10 PM said...

It's amazing some of the creeps that come out of the woodwork when a guy has a bad day.

For those of you who think daytraders are nuts why are you reading a daytrader's blog? You just come here to tell him how it's a stupid strategy on a day where he got smoked?

Lame.

-DT

Anonymous said...

ON Friday, you said "I'm speculating/gambling, call it what you want. "

And that was the problem. Never gamble...when trading, you need tools to put the "odds" in your favor. Most everything in life is a gamble, but knowledge is what makes the difference.
Years ago I woke up one morning and half of my account was wiped out at the open. I regrouped and now have a set of indicators and rules (ie, discipline) that keep me out of bad trades and large losses. This is what you need to do. If you used indicators or a system (that obviously didn't work for you Friday), scrap it or find out what is wrong with it and retool it.
You are hardly an idiot. Nothing of the sort.
With the Fed having drained liquidity as the market tanked last week, I highly doubt they care at this point....there are far bigger problems they need to try to address (which won't work anyway). So any PPT intervention, if any, won't help.
Expect the DOW to close around 11,720 Tuesday, and continue down intermediate term to 10.900. Eventually, you will see 7900.
So that you got out already is a good thing, in that it won't be "going up" now that you exited your position.
Retool, regroup, and come back when you have confidence in your indicators and "system".
This one is going to surprise the vast majority. A short term "bottom" won't occur in the next few days.

I do feel your pain from my past experiences and wish I could somehow help you.

Ragin' Cajun on 1:22 PM said...

DT,

I actually agree with you on something.

Anonymous said...

I feel for ya, kid. It's gonna hurt a bit, but tomorrow is another day. You'll be replaying it in your mind for awhile, but this too shall pass. Good luck in the future.

Anonymous said...

Sorry to hear you lose this much. I feel your pain. It sucks.

I suggest you take a couple days off to clear your head. You got my respect for showing that video to help others.

Nathan

Anonymous said...

Sorry to hear about your losses.

Knowing when to sell when losses are manageable is part of the process.

www.tickerforum.org

Bugpowder said...

I've been from $13.5k to $400 to... probably more than 13.5k at the open on Tuesday. You can bounce back, but you gotta have reasonable stops. EVERY TIME. I got my education from the losses and from www.tickerforum.org

Rod on 2:09 PM said...

We all as professional traders have gone through the same situation in our trading times and those who have learnt from their sufferings are the ones who are picking the fruits - I am sure if you try hard enough you could definitely recover from this loss, I have no doubt about this.

All The Best,
Rod

ZBS on 2:40 PM said...

The loss sucks but you will be stronger in the future. Next time just cut loss for half size if you do not want to cut for the whole position.

murphy1 said...

Sorry u had a blow up.By explaining the trade(speculation) and showing the video.I think u will help allot of newbies to avoid trading without a plan and strategies.

Best Regards

Anonymous said...

Best to invest in Gold and Silver - at least it wont go to Zero.

Anonymous said...

damn boy, you took a big hit four a young whipper snapper like ya...

ddg

Stewie on 4:42 PM said...

Hi HPT. My first time visiting your blog.
Great courage of you to post this video. Shows your character. Listen man, I cannot tell you how many times i had the same conversation with myself. My biggest single day was on a stupid earnings related short position in SLAB. Lost 60K that day. Anyway, this is trading. Love it or hate it. You can only blame yourself unfortunately and you must live/survive to fight another day even it means selling out. just know i have been thru many days just like the one you just had and i have more money in my account today and i am a better/wiser trader because of days like these. They teach you shit the hard way. The school of hard knocks for real. Lift your head, take a few days off and start from scratch man.

Stewie.

Anonymous said...

You can recover from this and tomorrow is a new day.

But you have no business trading at this point. As another comment put it, you have serious gambling issues. Absolutely no self control. If we sat down at a poker table long enough, I would have everything you own. And I'm only a player with a slight edge against most others. But I know when I'm beat, even if it's calling just one more bet, or whatever's left of my stack. I don't do it and fold. You will always bet and hope for the miracle. Up and down, but you will give it all back and more, every time.

Don't trade again, till you have saved up all of this loss, and then probably double. Maybe a year from now, you can start studying the markets and do simulation. Or maybe by then, you're on to something different.

euro gambler said...

hi hpt,

come on, dont give up blogging/trading. like someone said 40k is not a to big loss.
remember the gains you made until now.

the trader com is not in need of more personal wasted market analytics
and self appointed prophets which promote there stuff in the web. you can find tons of it on every corner.
Its uninteresting. I wanna see active traders no all knowing teachers.
it needs more guys like you or dinosaur trader who show there real trading. Respect
for doing that in such an open way. many traders it helps reading
about guys who figth at the same front right in time.

Its no secret for you what blow you up. but youll think about it and
next time youll be prepared und watch your risk exposure.

shit happens constantly and to everyone in trading. Look at the "big" pros in the banks.
Just high paid suckers knowing all and giving "top" advices to there costumers. then they lose
nets of then years in one year. Whos not seduced to stick on his sinking baby sometimes.
Free your mind and strip useless away. dow fut loses not every day 500.
if yes than would be your prob the least in world.


greetings from europe, and sorry for battling the dax in the dirt
ive found your blog just 1 hour ago ....

DigiKelly on 5:19 PM said...

Sorry to hear about your loss. We are both young traders, and I have been on the other side of the trade. I have been short for 2.5 years, and taken pounding after pounding trying to catch the peak.

I stayed in the market though, and learned from losing $60k. I stayed short with PUTs over the long weekend, and will likely be able to walk with 6 figures tomorrow.

For the longest time I would say "fuck the bulls" and "the reckoning is coming, and they get what they deserve". I take that back. You obviously deserve more respect than that for sharing your pain and experience.

I see lots of comments from tickerforum.org folks, and it is true, i have been able to become profitable from learning from experienced traders there.

Catch you on the flip side brother.

K

Anonymous said...

Come to ticker forum.

Lots of guys there who have been where you have and recovered and lived to tell the tale.

Although I do not day trade but the lessons being pounded into my head from everyone over there regarding money management has been of immense value to me.

Anonymous said...

Sorry for you man...

Hope you'll learn something of this. One thing altough... Don't give up just now... on an intraday basis, you looked pretty good...

Maybe you needed this to become stronger...

In any case, I hope you get through this ok and come back better.

ATradeADay on 6:13 PM said...

I've blown out twice. I think it's a healthy part of learning who you are and what you're made of. Unfortunately it sucks, but what are you going to do.

-Jonathan

John B said...

Sorry...been there and understand what you're going through. In 1994, I had over $1 billion under management and I had to invest in the 5 year, which was down 20% from Feb to Nov. Started drinking very seriously...needless to say that really hurt.

You're a much younger man that I and I'm sure you will recover...it just doesn't seem so now.

Just don't try to earn it all back in a day.

Good Luck

John

Brett Steenbarger, Ph.D. on 6:20 PM said...

Dear HPT,

My best wishes to you; these are the kinds of life events that make or break you. Back in August, 1982 (I'm showing my age!), I held a short position through the start of the greatest bull market in history. Months of profits (and many dreams) melted away in a matter of days.

I took an extended break from the markets, refocused on my work as a psychologist, took a new position shortly thereafter, and within a few months met the woman who would become my wife.

When I did return to the markets, it was after considerable study of patterns and a new approach to risk management.

Still, I can feel the pain of 1982 as if it happened recently. And, in a sense, I hope it never goes away. It gives me respect for the markets and empathy for the traders I work with.

I really hope this can be a start to your own transformation, whether it's as a trader or not. Sometimes it takes a shock like a major loss to turn many things around. Best of luck; stay in touch--

Brett

Anonymous said...

Excellent comment left here by Genesis. His assessment of the market, as well as his points about risk management, are spot on.

JReality

Anonymous said...

And to think, only a few hours earlier you were a cocky little rooster, laughing at the shorts.

My my, how times change.

Anonymous said...

Only he is lost who believes he is lost. Tomorrow is another day.

MC on 6:53 PM said...

Take the much needed break and when you are ready...you be much wiser trader. Good luck and enjoy your time away from the grind of the market.

-pinoytrader

Anonymous said...

My advice.

Let people laugh at you and make you a celebrity example case. Be the poster boy of this crash - really - get on the news - youtube webstar posterchild of the 2008 crash.

Then make your come back and you'll be the guy who crashed and came back to save the day. Many people have the story - only you'll be able to market it to your advantage.

Yes, I work a lot in marketing.

Anonymous said...

After watching your video, you don't have the mental makeup that is required to trade.

Anonymous said...

Hi HPT,

I have been following your blog for a while. I am sorry to read about your losses.

My own painful losses taught me that smaller position = smaller risk. However, all that didn't stop me from taking a big equity position in ALB because I thought it was a bargain, relative to its recent high. So now I am dreading the opening tomorrow.

Sincerely hope you can recover from this and go on to success.
Best of luck to you.

Victor

Anonymous said...

Don't let it screw with your confidence man. Maybe watch "Rounders."

I'm a poker player first but I've made better money off commodities. Play this like a bull and give commodities a shot. It's the right sector to be in right now. Otherwise: short the banking/retail industry cept GS. The cat isn't done bouncing. There's still money to be made off of rate cuts.

My opinion for what it's worth. Sorry bout you loss.

Anonymous said...

My dad lost 30 million in the early nineties crash. 30 million he had loaned. The debt collectors haunt him to this day.

If you lost "only" 40 thousand. Consider yourself lucky. You can still recover from a loss like that.

But do the recovering by working instead of trying to win the money back by gambling on the stock market.

Tim Knight on 8:15 PM said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

maybe the Diehards can save you:

www.diehards.org

post #11754

Anonymous said...

please post a follow up video and or blog after tommarrows close. I'm sorry about your loss, but that video is great and helpful. it is viral video worthy. as someone else in marketing said you could milk it for all it's worth. best of luck i hope you take a break then come back and make it all back 100 fold.

jeff on 8:34 PM said...

John, FWIW, my heart goes out to you. I truly hope you'll rebound!

Anonymous said...

Hey, man. Just stumbled upon your site from another site.

Sorry to hear about the loss.

I'm not much of a trader, but more of a stock guy (always long), heavy on the fundamental analysis. Best way to do it, in my opinion.

But I think some of my experience can be translated over to your situation, as I have been in a similar situation, myself.

NEVER go all in on one trade. At one point, 90% of my net worth was in one stock. This was back in 2000. And yup, that stock crashed hard, bringing me close to zero. Fortunately, I did not sell. I was able to hang on, and eventually the stock recovered (mostly). At that point, I slowly whittled down my position, and spread that money out.

It was painful for years. But the bottom line is, I eventually recovered, and moved on.

And so can you.

I never made that same mistake again. And I never will.

Hopefully you have learned your lesson, as well.

Good luck, man. And be careful out there.

Tomorrow is always another day.

Anonymous said...

Thanks for posting the Video, it sure to help some people.

tj3

Anonymous said...

Dumbass

Dave Johnson on 9:14 PM said...

The trade is only one aspect. It's the sheer magnitude of the bet that got ya HPT.

Anonymous said...

A lot of the folks here haven't been following your blog over time. If they had, they would see that this blow up was inevitable, and would dispense with the lame exhortations to 'go get 'em next time.'

Some people were laughing at your video, others felt sorry for you. I was pissed off at you, because I saw you make the same mistakes -- albeit on a more grand scale -- that you have been making and whining about on your blog for a long time now. When are you going to get serious about stopping your self-destructive behavior?

I have little doubt you can trade, but you've got a lot of issues to sort through in your head before you should go back to it.

Anonymous said...

I am quite surprised by the amount of "positive" comments here on your unfortunately ordeal. Regardless, I still admire you for coming out in public and admit you've made a mistake.

Seriously, don't give up just yet. Stop trading right now and go back to the drawing board. Find out why you made the mistake.

I recommend you to go and read Dr Van Tharp's materials. The psychology part of trading have gotten you, plus your lack of awareness in position sizing.

Good luck in the future. $31k is nothing compared to what others have lost out there in the last several days.

Smarter investor said...

Thank you for the cash, kid!

M.G. said...

Be sure, you are one of the luckier people. Some guys i've heard - here in germany and the USA - lost all there money at one single hour. Hundred thousands of Dollars. They ruined there life ... for ever.

So, be sure, your life goes on... make the best of it.

Good Luck :-)

Missbossy on 12:19 AM said...

That's $40k worth of training.

bytestream said...

Take a deep breath. It would not be wise to try and win back your losses on Tuesday, now your talking gambling.

Consider yourself extremely lucky you have any capital left, many people will wipe out their entire portfolio. Use a stop loss, don't over leverage. Consider this weekend as a very unfortunate and expensive warning to you.

Anonymous said...

Hey, man. Just wanted to say it's a good blog, nice of you to allow others to learn from your mistakes. I hope it'll get better for you.

Anonymous said...

You might find this helps:

http://www.economonkey.com/2008/01/09/investor-emotions-part-3-remorse/

Good luck.

Anonymous said...

PWNT

Anonymous said...

The fact that you were willing to share that video with the rest of the world tells me that you will overcome this setback. I feel for you, I think we are about the same age and I've gone through the same thing trading the last three years. Your reaction was very human. I've seen people in my company loose hundreds of thousands in a single day, smash keyboards, monitors etc. This is unfortunately the game that we picked and it is a lesson that all of us have had to learn. Use this opportunity to learn from your mistakes and become wiser. Keep your head up. Regroup and get back to it!!

Anonymous said...

should have held - you'd be in the money now

jck on 11:31 AM said...

HPT:
Everybody has gone through this sort of thing, it's not a loss it's a lesson.Cheer up, you are young, just remember cut your losses short and don't over-leverage.
Best.

Anonymous said...

I have blown out an account, but have come back. And so can you. Don't try to recoup everything by making risky trades. Go slow and steady. Learn to get over your tendency to gamble. Save that for Vegas. Make good trades. If you are willing, you will make it back plus more. All the best to you!

Anonymous said...

I am sorry that this happened to you - this is really no laughing matter - a very humbling experience to just watch what you went through.

I shared your video with two of my fellow co-workers today - we are all entry investors from mid last year(stocks &options) and this made us really pay attention to the importance of money management skills and accepting risk.

I would like to see your video back online with the bleeps over the curse words so that you can share this experience for others to learn from. I returned tonight to watch it again to just let what you went through soak in and use it as a warning of what can happen in this market.

I am sure with your skills that you will make what you lost 30 fold or more as a result of this experience. As I write, all I can think about is Jesse Livermore who may be able to provide you a glimpse of hope that you are going to make it - stick to your guns. We all know you are not quitter.

If Jesse doesn't inspire you, then I have to leave you with a quote from the Rocky Balboa Movie:

Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain’t all sunshine and rainbows. It is a very mean and nasty place and it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain’t how hard you hit; it’s about how hard you can get hit, and keep moving forward. How much you can take, and keep moving forward. That’s how winning is done. Now, if you know what you’re worth, then go out and get what you’re worth. But you gotta be willing to take the hit, and not pointing fingers saying you ain’t where you are because of him, or her, or anybody. Cowards do that and that ain’t you. You’re better than that!

Later
Steven

9secondsflat said...

back in 89 i was pitching a stock..aklm (aklaim entertainment) about 5 minutes into the pitch..the customer says the market is crashing...i said naw the dow is only down 150 points...5 minutes later it was down 350 points not long later over 500 points...needless to say he didnt buy the 1000 shares of aklm i was pitching...funny thing...i made it through the day while others freaked out and bottom ticked stocks i was buying since i didnt know any better...second guessing ones self sucks...if you cant take the pressure get out...believe me no one has bottom ticked more stocks on the sell side and or top ticked them on the up side than me...fuck it live and learn or live and burn...the choice is yours..as for me...i will stick with funds...yeah i know they are slow, they suck...one good stock, one good day...i have heard it all...and at the end of the day as i have said many times it isnt if you are right or wrong but about more or less.

Anonymous said...

Hi HPT,

I hope this will give you some boost. I lost 36,000 last year. What did I do? NO QUIT.

I went back to my books, read every book, re-read them again and again. I started paper trading to test if I can implement what I've studied. I followed the rules from the books religiously and made some handsome profits.

Once I got little confidence, I put in $1000 hard-earned money and started trading on small-scale.

After 2 months, I'm doing pretty ok.

Hope this helps!!!

Anonymous said...

First, let me say I have not yet put on a single real money daytrade yet (except the occasional opportunistic ones in past years while swing trading). That doesn't mean you should discount what I have to say because I think most profitable traders will support me in the three points I will mention.

I have resisted the urge (almost every week) to plunk down $5000 into a leveraged prop trading account. Instead, I am squaring up some of my debt, reading, reading, and reading some more about trading discipline, rules of trading, etc. I have a 6-figure job in software engineering and its tough to give up the golden handcuffs but I'm really tempted lately to quit and fully invest my efforts in discretionary daytrading. I feel I have a better than average temperament for it, and I might make a moderately comfortable living doing so. All the while I am papertrading my ass off, and learning to test my trading instincts while simultaneously following disciplined "rules" I have customized for my own trading personality. No matter what the magazines say, I think this is a valuable exercise in seeing exactly how profits scale, finding weaknesses in one's methods, and basically providing a good proof of concept for daytrading. Also, its not the first time I've exposed this amount of money to risk, I have never had that psychological gag reflex to using real money, it just never bothered me or affected my judgement that much. I did some swing trading in several past years before I knew it had a name and I never lost any money. I just never made much by year's end because I "knew" the principle but never fully comprehended it, that cutting losses quickly without the paralysis of hope setting in, is critical to making the profitable trades pay off. I was right on with my good picks, I made a killing on most of them. But I MARRIED MY LOSERS, they ran and ran and ran, and I averaged down, waiting to add them to my list of winners, as I knew they would inevitably turn. Then I eventually cut them with mammoth losses. Now as I practice daytrading I cut my losses as dispassionately as I blow my nose, and its amazing how natural it feels after seeing it work so many times - its just intuitive but you have to experience its benefit first hand to really comprehend. It frees me up to investigate other trades, it preserves 98% of my money or more for the next day. And when I do begin discretionary daytrading I definitely am going to use a drop dead limit on a per day basis. I'll only be equity trading so my drop dead will be about $1000 per day. My stake will either be $5000 in a prop trading account, or $25K-$50K in a retail broker account. I don't want to put more than 5K in a prop because I have 30:1 leverage anyway, and a higher deposit means more margin fees per month which I want to keep trimmed to the minimum, because it'll be about $250 in fees to direct trade as it is (including 30:1 margin fees on 5K-10K deposit amount)

On paper trades I am averaging about $600 profit per day, worst day -$1100, best day +$2100, many days > $1000, some days just a few hundred. I'd say I close my trading day in the money 5-6 days for every one loss day, and I'd say that ruthlessly cutting my losses is the single most important change I made to my past trading to hold my profits.

This may not be as glam as option or futures, but it will pay the bills and keep me away from 9 to 5 tedium. I know what options are, and I know what futures are, but knowing how to move chess pieces does not a chess player make. I will slowly try to bring those derivatives in after I have mastered the art of equity trades.


THE GOOD
1) You are fessing up, so you are not in denial. That is good. You should never deny what has hapenned, rather take responsibility for good AND bad, which you are doing.

THE BAD
1) Stops. Stops... Stops......
A good trade usually starts out good, a bad one usually gets worse.

THE UGLY
1) 40K lost in two days, totally preventable. Discipline is there to keep you in the game, not to prevent you from making money. Trade with discipline and you'll have 96-98% of your money left to trade tomorrow. You can't profit if you have no money left to trade.

THINGS TO THINK ABOUT
1) You may subconsciously want to be out of trading, which is why you drained your account in one sitting, instead of taking a small loss and moving on to another trade. Maybe not, but consider your psychological motivations for trading. Do you want to trade?

I think you may have the intellect and skills to be a trader, but until you master that emo element of it, the self-sabotage may continue. I won't be condascending, it is my greatest fear I will do something similar one day for one reason or another. It only takes one day unfortunately (or 2 in your case). Its like walking a titerope. Small steps, each reward is a step closer to the other side. Then one slip and you're plumetting to the ground. Its a sucky reality of trading, and the one reassuring thing to me is that it is 100% under your control if you want it to be.

-An anonymous INTJ, new to direct access daytrading, with a good record of capital preservation ranging from flat to modest gains in swing trading.

(by the way, if there are any wealthy traders reading this who are inspired to back a trader like me with a small amount of risk capital (I really don't want to dip into my 401K), let me know on the blog here and I'll send you my contact info.

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